Stop the Insanity!

You guys remember Susan Powter? Did you know she’s still around and still skinny? For some reason her ‘stop the insanity’ battle cry has been rattling around in my head. This isn’t really about her or her weight loss or even weight loss in general. I just feel like screaming at the top of my lungs – STOP THE INSANITY! There, I feel better.

This post is actually about support. I’m a firm believer in support following weight loss surgery. A good support system, in my not so humble opinion, can mean the difference between WLS success and failure. Support can come in many forms. You could attend local support meetings sponsored by your surgeon or the hospital where you had your surgery. You could create your own local support group. You could have family and/or friends to lean on. You could join any number of communities online. You could do any combination of these things.

For myself, personally, a good support group has to ‘get me’. They need to be supportive and understanding of the fact that I’m an individual. They need to understand that my journey is not their journey and vice versa. Remember folks, no matter how much somebody loves or cares about you, NOBODY cares as much about your journey as YOU do. They need to understand that ultimately, in the end, it IS my journey and what works for them may not work for me, what works for me may not work for them. What’s important in support is, well, SUPPORT.

sup·port  (s-pôrt, -prt) (courtesy of:

tr.v. sup·port·edsup·port·ingsup·ports

1. To bear the weight of, especially from below.
2. To hold in position so as to keep from falling, sinking, or slipping.
3. To be capable of bearing; withstand: “His flaw’d heart . . . too weak the conflict to support” (Shakespeare).
4. To keep from weakening or failing; strengthen: The letter supported him in his grief.
5. To provide for or maintain, by supplying with money or necessities.
6. To furnish corroborating evidence for: New facts supported her story.


a. To aid the cause, policy, or interests of: supported her in her election campaign.
b. To argue in favor of; advocate: supported lower taxes.
8. To endure; tolerate: “At supper there was such a conflux of company that I could scarcely support the tumult” (Samuel Johnson).
9. To act in a secondary or subordinate role to (a leading performer).



a. The act of supporting.
b. The state of being supported.
2. One that supports.
3. Maintenance, as of a family, with the necessities of life.

Emphasis on the above is mine. This is what support means to me. I’ve met a group of girls (and a sprinkling of guys) who epitomize what support means to me. Recently that group has come under fire. Why? For not conforming to other people’s standards. There’s a lot of raw honesty in this group. It’s not all sunshine and roses. It’s not all unicorns farting rainbows.

(I dare you to get that image out of your mind now) It’s not all positive and happy and shiny. What it is is gritty and real and raw. It’s the reality of day to day life. Not just losing weight but, health problems, regain, emotional problems. You name it, someone in this wonderful group of crazy ‘misfits’ has experienced it.

The Bariatric Bad Girls Club is a social network where members find support and tools for advocacy. Real women (and a few brave men) share the good, the bad, and the ugly of everyday life after weight loss surgery, including matters from which others shy away. The BBGC emphasizes education and self-advocacy for bariatric patients. Its members fervently believe in correcting the misinformation surrounding life after weight loss surgery, but they just as adamantly believe in maintaining a humor-filled atmosphere and not taking themselves too seriously. The BBGC was created for the misfits of one-size-fits-all bariatric mentalities.

And yet, there are those out there who would tell me my support system is inadequate. Never mind they don’t know what other forms of support I may have. Never mind the fact that in the short time I’ve been conversing with the BBGC, I’ve felt more supported and cared about by a group of TOTAL STRANGERS than I have at any point in my post weight loss surgery journey.

Thank you ladies (and gents) of the BBGC for not sugar coating ANYTHING (if I want something sugar coated, I’ll eat a cupcake, thanks). Thank you for keeping it REAL (if sometimes STINKY, ya’ll know what I’m saying). Most of all thank you all for being very uniquely YOU.

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.

Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.

~Dr. Suess

I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

~Kurt Cobain