What’s this, an update?

I haven’t posted in awhile. The truth is, I’ve been really frustrated with my weight loss or lack thereof. I try to tell myself all things will happen in time. If I follow the program, I won’t be able to help but lose weight. Still, it gets incredibly frustrating when you do everything right (though I DO need to exercise more) and the weight loss slows or becomes almost non-existent.

To make things worse, I actually GAINED 4 pounds. There is no way with the amount of calories and carbs (Less than 900 calories a day and generally around 30 grams of carbs) I consume that I could gain that much weight in less than a week. It may just be water weight but I’m not sure. My hands don’t feel too puffy (maybe a little) and I can usually tell when I’m bloated from water but, you can imagine just how ‘meh’ that left me feeling. I’ve been averaging 10 pounds a month weight loss but gaining back that four pounds (even IF it’s just water) has put me off that average.

Maybe I’m just impatient, I don’t know. I try really, really hard not to compare myself to other people because I know it’s unhealthy and can lead to disappointment. It’s still really difficult to see people who had their surgeries after I did and who have much less weight to lose than I did losing more weight since their surgeries than I have.

I should be very happy. In total, I’ve lost 124 pounds (120 if you count this four inexplicable pounds I managed to gain). 64 pounds were lost pre-surgery. That leaves the other 60 post surgery, in six months time. I am proud of that weight loss but I still somehow feel as if it’s ‘not good enough’. I’m starting to have fears I always kind of laughed off when I saw other people posting. “What if this is it?” I know, deep down, it isn’t but I’ve failed so many times in the past, those old demons tend to rear their ugly heads.

I’ve been sick a lot this winter, just like I am every freaking winter, which hasn’t helped any. I’m finally getting some energy back but I was hit with back to back illnesses (including a 24 hour stomach bug) and left with a lingering cough. Now that I’m finally feeling better, I should be able to step up my exercise. I need some great ideas though since I simply can not afford to join a gym right now, no matter how much I want to, or spend a lot of money buying things to help me exercise.


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Angel Austin
    Mar 04, 2011 @ 10:11:21

    I sooo understand how you feel. I’m inching along at this point. http://www.fight4yourlifeonline.org/?page_id=144

    As you can see, I’ve slowed down to an “inch”. BUT I’ve started moving more and it’s happening again. Be encouraged. Don’t give up. You will make it. I’m rooting for you. We can talk more, if you like; share recipes, exercise tips, etc. Whatever we need to do to make it through this together!


  2. Brenda Lu
    Mar 04, 2011 @ 22:53:18

    Try Crossfit.com
    The lady i work for goes to the facility and she had VSG in August ’10 and has lost 98 lbs. She has had to up her calories and protein bc she burns so much doing these exercises and for some reason they list the exercises on their website. It looks like it is different for each day of the week. I plan on doing that when I have my surgery. Hopefully sooner rather than later. I am awaiting ins. approval. Good luck!


  3. Lisa
    Mar 11, 2011 @ 18:43:59

    Sorry you are going through this! Don’t give up. you have come so far and are inspiring to me! My surgery is in 5 days!

    – Lisa


  4. Waning Woman
    Mar 13, 2011 @ 10:44:07

    I know how you feel. I’ve got posts and posts about my frustration with the weight loss process. There was a point almost 40 lbs ago that I was SURE I was dunzo. Just keep trying and keep working and don’t give up.
    *big hugs*


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